Every time I hang out with someone besides my roommates, I’m asked about work, my current jobs, and what my next step is going to be. Every time I’m asked these questions, I tend to generalize my current situation and downplay what I do. I don’t know why I do it, because it’s certainly not a good thing, but I just do. And I think it’s either one of two things… Or maybe even both. It may be because I don’t like talking about myself and going into depth about my life and my current goals/dreams. It’s just not my personality, and I would much rather push the attention on to someone else and listen to their story. Or it could also be because I have this notion that after college you have to follow a certain path, and since I haven’t been… that what I’m doing is not considered “right.”
It wasn’t until I had a long conversation with an old friend that I was slapped back into reality.
They told me “Get over the idea of doing things based on what others think. Realize what makes you you, what makes you happy, and own it. Start living for you.”
They continued to add, “The way people interpret what you do is based on how you present it. Don’t down play your passion, or what makes you happy. It’s your life and you have to accept it and believe in it before others can.”
And the fact of the matter is, I am proud of what I’m doing now. I just was too focused on what I wasn’t doing, to realize that what I was doing was doing what was most important; making me happy.
As for next year, there will be some new decisions that will need to be made, but all I know is that whatever I choose to do, it will be because it makes me happy, and it makes me, me. And it will be something that when asked what I do, I will be proud to tell the entire truth, no matter how long it takes. I’m excited for my new perspective on things, and for what’s to come.
-And to my friend who told me all of this, you know who you are, and I thank you from the bottom of my heart.
shannon / marklin 