Last Thursday there was a a studio open house that took place in Raleigh, where 16 design agencies in the area opened their doors for people to come see their work, get a feel for the actual space, and network with all sorts of people in the marketing and advertising industry. As a free event, it was a great opportunity to get out there, meet new people and try to make a name for yourself. As I met up with a few former studio mates, with business cards and resumés in hand, I felt like I was ready to network.

The guest list online was hundreds of people long, but I figured since it wasn’t all in one place, it wouldn’t be so bad. Yeah..I was wrong. Even with only about 20 people in one studio, it was still pretty intimidating to strike up a conversation, not to mention try to stand out.

The first studio was pretty rough, it was obvious I didn’t really have my thoughts in order, and wasn’t quite yet comfortable in the setting. I guess it was actually really obvious since one of the employees of the first studio came up and gave advice on how to start conversations, network, and “fit in” better. Thanks for the subtle hint!

I knew I could do better, and I knew I just needed to get over any hesitant thoughts and just go for it. We went to about 3 or 4 more studios, and I could definitely feel myself being more outgoing, and making better use of this opportunity. After swapping a few resumés and business cards, I was feeling good about the new relationships I’d initiated, and the potential opportunities that might come of them.

But through all of the awkward introductions, small-talk, and quick exchange of business cards, there’s still the thought “Did I make a lasting impression on them?” Yes, I might have gotten an “in” because I talked to them for more than 5 minutes, or they seemed interested in getting my information, but they probably did that to hundreds of other people too.

There were plenty of qualified and talented people that walked through the same studio doors as I did that night, so it makes me wonder if I did enough to leave an impression.

What about me, or what about what I said to that person, stands out above the rest?
What did I need to do to ensure they would remember me the next day, or even next month?

I’m not the only one that left behind a business card, or followed up the next day with an email. There needed to be something else that I could have done, but what?

This was not something I had thought of before Thursday obviously, and I wish I had. But it’s definitely something I’ll figure out for next time.

This past weekend I traveled to Chicago to conduct interviews for High School Diplomats, an exchange program I work for year-round. To keep within budget, the trip was only for about a 24-hour time span: 7:30pm arrival Friday night – 7:30pm departure Saturday night. I was excited for the trip because I had never been outside the Chicago O’hare airport, and thought I might get a chance to see what this big city had to offer.

Here’s what I gathered from the trip:

1. Apparently Chicago can’t handle rain at 50 degree weather. My flight was delayed about 2.5 hours on the way there

2. Chicago drivers, at least at the airport, are insane. Don’t even think about driving 1mph under the speed limit, or even try to merge into their line.

3. It should really be called Chicago–the freaking windy city. If I didn’t sprint from the car to the building, I would literally get swept away by the wind

4. Seems like a great city to train for a marathon in. It’s pretty daggone flat up there.

5. Even with Google Maps on an iPhone and a GPS, it’s still possible to get lost if you travel with me.

6. Adding the word “swag” occasionally to the end of you sentence bumps up your cool status big time.

7. 24 hours is not enough time to see any city, especially one of the biggest in the country. Especially when most of my time was either spent in a high school giving interviews, or in the airport waiting for yet another delayed flight.

8. and lastly…Hertz don’t hurt. Hertz is a great rental car company. Great customer-service, sick rides, and all at a relatively good price. After being flustered from the long trip, the Hertz employees really put me at ease, and made my first experience of renting a car less nerve-racking and way more enjoyable.

Overall, the candidates we interviewed were great, it was good to reconnect with my fellow staff member, the hospitality at the high school was unbelievable, and it was good to get away for a day or so. But I still would have to say it was sure nice to be back in good ol’ Raleighwood! I think next time I’d like to go back for at least a full weekend, definitely in the summer, to get a better perspective of the city, as well as try to track down the Chicago Cash Cab!

“Life can be so hard that the temptation to quit or coast tempts us sorely. But there’s no joy to be had in stopping short. So when God rocks our world, we keep on believing. Not that we’ll have our way or that we won’t ever experience such awful hurt again. We keep on believing that God knows what He’s about. And that, if there were any place better for us than the one in which we find ourselves, Divine Love would have placed us there.”
-Charles Spurgeon

I’m usually not one to reference bible excerpts or religious quotes for that matter, but this day is a little different. My best friend from growing up, Lauren, sent me this quote in an email the other day. At first it seemed a little out of the blue, or just another one of her tries to preach on me (with the greatest intentions of course), but I was glad she sent it.

For a couple of reasons.

1. This quote from Charles Spurgeon, a popular British Baptist preacher from the 1800s, talks about something that I struggle with often throughout the year, as I’m sure most other people do, too. Every big decision we make, or every new road we chose to take, comes a lot of hope, and excitement for what lies ahead. But it is also usually paired eventually with a lot of struggle, and a lot of doubt. When this happens to me, I try to hang on as long as possible, but the tougher it gets, I ponder the thought of throwing in the towel and exhaling a defeating “Whatever” response. But for those few times when I stuck it out, kept my head up, and tried to keep the bigger picture in mind, it was worth it in the end. Because a lot of the time, the bigger the struggle, the bigger the reward. Am I right, or am I right?!

and 2. The main reason Lauren sent the email was because she had been thinking about this quote for a few days, and as it helped her push through, she thought it would help me push through as well. Instead of keeping Spurgeon’s quote to herself, she passed it on to someone else, in hopes that it would help them the same way it did her. It didn’t matter if the email seemed out of the blue, or if the recipient didn’t find relevance to the quote, it just mattered that she sent it. Because it showed she cared. And it showed that even though she’s 6 states away, she still thinks of me, and wants the best for me.

And that’s what I call true friendship. Being able to look past your personal issues, to help another. So thanks Lauren, for the email, and for always being there. For all those times you’ve tried to throw religious references on me, mark this as the day that you’ve finally gotten through to me.

No one wants to do it because no one likes to do it. It’s one of the the worst things in the world, actually. The thought of losing someone, and not having them in  your life for the next few years, is not a fun one to ponder. But it happens. All the time. With every new stage of our lives, we usually find ourselves having to say goodbye to someone. So the question is, what’s the best way to do it?

How do you spend the last few weeks leading up to the last day? How do you spend the last few days with them? How do you want to spend the last night together? Who do you want to spend it with, and how do you want the mood of the night to go?

For Paul, he wanted to spend the last night before flying out for the Peace Corps, with his girlfriend Maggie, and a couple of his closest friends, at his house in Hillsborough. Luckily we got all the drinking out the night (and multiple weekends) before, so we could just spend this night playing a game of MadGab (hilarious) and a new superlative game (also hilarious, and just another one of Paul’s games). And then capping the night off with some good conversation around a bonfire. We passed the time by making fun of each other and reminiscing about embarrassing and funny times spent in college. The weekends leading up to this night (pretty much every weekend since New Years), we’ve been making sure to live it up with as many friends as possible in hopes of distracting ourselves from the inevitable truth. But this last night, was all about reflecting on the good times with each other, and not being afraid to get a little sentimental. There were points of the night where we got cramps in our stomachs from laughing so much, and then there were those short pauses of silences and a few teary eyes.

In my opinion, it was the perfect way to go out. It was good closure to the past 5 years, and it was a good way to keep Paul’s mind off of the stresses of what’s to come. It was comforting to bring up embarrassing memories, and the awkward freshmen year stories, and to see how through it all, we’ve all stayed friends….and have gotten closer because of it all. And this last year…especially these last few months, I feel like we’ve been on such a high and that everyone’s gotten a lot closer than before. We ended on a high note, that’s for sure. And to me, that’s the ideal way.

Then as 1am rolled around, one by one we started saying our goodbyes. And like I said, it sucked. What are you supposed to say in your last few minutes with someone you call your best friend, before they head out for 2.5 years? How can you get out all of what you’re feeling right then and there? You want to say everything, but can’t seem to fight back the tears long enough to tell it the way you want. But in the end, it doesn’t matter what you say. Because the past 5 years speak for themselves. All the ups and downs you had together, all the fun times and hard times you shared together, and the fact that you’re standing next to each other through it all, says it all.

Saying goodbye sucks. But like my friend Brad said, “How lucky am i to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard?”

Pretty dang lucky.

Growing up, I used to be told “A lot can happen in 10 years.” Then it got knocked down to “A lot can happen in 5 years.” But nowadays, it seems like a lot can happen even in the next two years. Especially now that I’m out of college and on my own, it seems like anything can happen, and my whole life could change in the next 24 months. Who knows if I’ll still be in Raleigh, or what I’ll even be doing.

This past year has been pretty bitter-sweet for me. It’s been nice to be out of college, away from the all-nighters and ridiculous homework assignments, but I also miss not having classes on Fridays and the perks of student discounts. It’s also been bittersweet because even thought it’s been great to have most of my college friends still in the area, we all know that this won’t be the case forever. For a lot of us, this year is a transition year. It’s a year for us to step back from the college lifestyle we’ve grown accustomed to for the past 4 years, and try to figure out the next stage of our lives. Some are more along in the process than others, and the reality of their decisions have been pretty tough to swallow.

In particular, my friends Paul and Maggie have been accepted into the Peace Corps, and will both be heading to Africa this year. While I still have about 3 months left with Maggie, Paul heads out to Madagascar on Sunday.

Even though I’ve known about his plans to go into the Peace Corps for a while, the “oh s!@#, you’re leaving for almost 3 years” factor is finally registering with me. 2.5 years of literally being cut off from your life in the States, can’t be an easy thing to wrap your head around and might even make you freak out a bit. To be placed in a completely different culture, with a different govt, type of currency, different food, living arrangements, neighbors, etc. etc. for such a long period of time has got to be life-altering. I can’t imagine how all the mixed emotions of excitement, happiness, nervousness, and a little bit of fear this kind of realization could put on someone.

I have no doubt that Paul is going to excel in Madagascar, and make his village a better place in the end. I have no doubt that he will settle in well with his people and make amazing, lifelong relationships. I have no doubt that he will live this opportunity to the fullest, and be appreciative of what he’s been given. He is the perfect guy for this type of journey, and I am proud of him for wanting to go through with it.

But I can’t help but wonder what it’s going to be like in 2013. We keep making jokes with him about how I’ll be a millionaire by the time he gets back, or how  technology will be so advanced that he won’t know what to do with himself, but really….things will be really different in 2013. But through all the worries of where people will be when he gets back, or what new obstacles we’ll come across, I know that no matter what, we’ll always be friends. And that’s really all that matters.

So to Paul, best of luck my friend. Your courage and selfless attitude is inspiring not only to me, but to all of your friends and family. You have an immense amount of love and support back home, and I for one can’t wait to hear about all your new adventures. I know things will be different in Madagascar, but don’t lose sight of what makes you who you are, because who you are is already pretty special.

A couple of weeks ago I decided to sign up online for a rec league, that pretty much had teams and leagues for any kind of sports. This was kind of those, ‘Ok Shannon, you’re out of school, it’s time to branch out, join an Adult League, and meet some new friends,‘ kind of decisions. Luckily, after about a week I was contacted by a team captain who noticed I was interested in joining a softball team. After a few weeks of not being able to go to practice due to prior engagements, I started to dread the next Sunday, my potential first day of practice. I had the first day jitters, worried that I was either not going to fit in with the team, or that I would completely embarrass myself on the field since I’ve been out of practice since HS. Regardless, I toughed it out and showed up this past Sunday for practice.

After the awkward introductions and some small talk, I asked the girl next to me if she wanted to warm-up and throw some. It took me an extra second to get used to the feeling of my 10 year-old glove on my right hand, and hoped it would at least hold out on me for this one day. The first throw was quite painful. Pretty sure every joint from my wrist to shoulder to back on my left side cracked as I softly threw the ball across 30 yards. This is where I would usually talk about my arthritic joints, or the fact that I’ve been out of the game for 4 years, or blah blah, but actually…despite being startled by the excessive joint crackage (my own word), that first throw felt good.

It felt good to be back on the field again, back to the ol’ stomping grounds. Back to the place that used to be my life from age 9-17. From little league, to high school, to club ball, I used to eat, breath, and live the game. I also played basketball and volleyball for school, but it was always softball that stood out amongst the rest. I made a lifelong list of memories and great friendships, and even though most of us have gone our separate ways, I know we could always pick up right where we left off.

And then when it came time for college, I decided to pack it up and try something new. Every now and then, as I would throw the frisbee back and forth on the IM fields, I would wonder what it would’ve been like if I had stuck with softball. It sucked at first, I often thought I lost a certain part of me. How could you just up and quit something that defined you? something that you truly loved?

Most of the time, I didn’t really have a clear answer. But in the end, I wouldn’t have had it any other way. I left the game on a good note, and I was able to preserve the great times I had back in the day. I left the game and found a new game, and went on to make new friendships and new memories.

But when Sunday’s practice rolled around, it was also a good feeling to know that I still had it in me, and that it hadn’t lost its fire.

Most things in life, we try our hardest to plan out in advance. We plan out what kind of education we want to pursue after high school. Then we try to plan out what kind of job we’re going to have post-graduation. Most of the time, we try to plan out what we’re going to do this weekend, or even what we’re going to have for dinner that night. Whether it’s a simple task as to what we’re going to wear that day, or a more complex situation as to where we’re going to buy our first house, we always plan things out. And we do this mainly so we are more prepared for what’s to come, and to be more efficient with our time. But, we also plan in order to avoid mistakes.

The same works for photography. Photographers are always planning ahead; thinking of different poses they’re going to have their client stand in, or new locations that they want use for future sessions. They’re always planning out what time of day to shoot at, what equipment they’re going to need for the shoot, etc. When they go out to take photographs, they usually always have a plan, or at least a general idea of the who/what/when/where/why and how’s of what they’re about to take photographs of. And for the same reasons, they do it because being a professional photographer means you are always prepared and efficient with your work. And obviously they don’t want to make mistakes either.

But then there are also those times when planning isn’t necessary. Those times when you just get up, take your camera, and just go somewhere. Not really in a desire to find the perfect photograph, but more just to explore. With no agenda in hand, you walk around just hoping you’ll come across something, eventually, and be able to take a decent photograph. And it’s during those times, that the unexpected happens. That beauty is found in the most random situations. You might come across an area that wouldn’t seem at all attractive or interesting if you were to plan it out ahead, but it turned out to actually be quite compelling when you were right in front of it.  Simple, everyday objects that you don’t always notice, or don’t really think of when imagining a photograph, are discovered and become somewhat beautiful.

It might not be the most efficient time ever spent, or the most prepared you’ve ever felt, but that doesn’t matter. Because when you do finally come across that one shot, that one unexpected moment, you will have learned something new that was well worth the aimless wandering. And what is really interesting, is even though you didn’t plan ahead, you still can’t make mistakes. Because how can you make mistakes when you didn’t have expectations or a purpose in the first place?

About twice a year, my friends from school like to take a trip out to Oak Island for a weekend to celebrate our friends’ Landon and Steven’s bdays. This time around, we decided to change it up and dedicate the weekend to Maggie and Paul, two friends who are headed off to the Peace Corps this year. I’m not one to bring a camera out at night, but I did decide to take my camera to the beach and around the island to snap a few shots of the crew during the day. This was actually the first time I racked up enough courage to pull my camera out in front of my friends since I’ve started to get more serious about photography. But throughout the weekend, as my friends got more comfortable in front of the camera, so did I. I wish I had done this a lot sooner, so from now on I’m going to make it a goal to get better about having my camera on hand on all our future trips.

So here’s a few selected pictures of the weekend, hopefully giving you a little synopsis of the weekend (during the day at least!):

a little cold eh?

the classic jump-at-the-same-time pose, thanks to Natalie

the boys and their bocce ball

poor Paul and his favorite pair of jeans :)

then we took it to the streets for some antiquing, coffee and soup..

and some jawbreakers. Pretty sure that thing lasted all weekend!

some had more fun than others..

All throughout college when I would apply for jobs, I was always told about the importance of following up to each employer. Time and time again, whether it was my parents, professors, or my older, employed friends, they would preach about how a simple thank you, or an extra phone call would help me stand out in the job market. In theory, it seemed to make sense. And I believed them, sure, because after all, they were all currently employed. And I did try it, a couple times, but I can honestly say I don’t remember a specific time when I received the benefits of my extra effort.

It wasn’t until I was on the other side of the interviewing table, did I have my ah-ha moment. I’ve recently been conducting Skype interviews for the exchange program that I work for, and I’ve noticed that as the numbers pile up, it gets harder and harder to differentiate each applicant. It is then, that the “little things” start to come in to play. Things like how each person dresses for the interview, how they portray their tone in their emails, etc. And then there’s the follow-up email, thanking you for taking the time to interview them, thanking you for your consideration and the opportunity to apply for this program. A simple thank you.

When I got off the phone with an applicant, I was impressed with how the interview went, and was optimistic of her potential in the program. However, I wasn’t blown away. There wasn’t that one thing that I could look back on after interviewing 200 more applicants, and explain why he/she needed to be accepted.

That was until I saw a (1) by my inbox. She took the extra effort, and it worked. And now I really am a firm believer in the power of the follow-up.